Tag Archives: positive

Inspiration

Failure is your friend

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, January 3, 2017 

As we reflect over this past year, can you count the number of times you’ve failed? Of course not, because you should be failing at something every day.

The only way to become successful or master a task is to have failed multiple times.

You see, failure is your friend. Failure’s goal is to teach each of us lessons.

For people trying to add muscle to their bodies, you must lift weights to failure. Each week when you attempt those same lifts, your body will be able to push further until a new failure kicks in. Keep repeating this process, and muscles will grow.

You can use this same physical process for every exercise or sporting skill you’re trying to master.

Think about all the practices and drills in order to play sports, musical instruments, artistry and years of education.

Each and every learned behavior of your existence was due a succession of failures.

Don’t we also learn from failed relationships, raising children, financial decisions and the quest to be spiritual? Starting to make sense?

You can’t let failure beat you up. Yes, sometimes it hurts and will get you down, but that’s your moment to build character.

A college professor of mine once told a story about Charles Schultz, the creator of the “Peanuts” cartoon. Schultz became severely depressed and chose to end his life by running until he had a heart attack. He took off sprinting in New York’s Central Park until he passed out.

When he woke, he walked home upset that the attempt failed. He continued this process each day until he realized that he was getting in shape and was deleting depression.

Now, this story might have been false, but the message made was clear to us college students.

Continual failure should harden you and make you stronger. Once this happens, then you can shake off failure like a doormat.

Failure only means that you’ve pushed yourself to the limit.

Believe me, you will find happiness and self-confidence through failure. Think about it.

Inspiration

Keep moving to stay balanced

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, December 27, 2016 

One of the first self-learned behaviors as an infant is walking. Of course, none of us can remember, but if you’re a parent, you’ve witnessed your own child experiencing the struggles.

Really think about the frustration of learning how to walk. You’re constantly falling, plus a lot of times are getting hurt.

All toddlers never give up. They have an instinct and a will to get back up, trust themselves and keep moving until they’ve conquered the task.

You see, walking is nothing more than a continuation of falling. You must put one foot in front of the other to stay balanced. If you miss one step, then you’ll fall on your face.

Once walking has been accomplished, you’ll speed up the process and start running. Plus, the fun really begins as you learn to hop, skip and jump.

People who can continually fall faster than others become track stars. Make sense?

Well my friends, this is your life. You must continually keep moving or you’ll lose course and fail. You’ll fall off the success trail while others speed past you.

Why, as adults, have you forgotten the determination you once possessed as a toddler? Why does that 2-year-old child have a “never give up” character trait and you don’t?

The truth is you’ve let life obstacles and failures keep you from chasing your dreams. You’ve accepted defeat and went into hiding.

Well, guess what? This is a new day, a new attitude, and nothing and no one can stop you.

Be that scrappy player on a team that doesn’t have all the skills, but is outworking and out-hustling everyone on the court.

You trusted yourself as a toddler, so it’s already in you. Pull out that warrior and get out there to conquer the world.

Punch negative thoughts in the face and run to the finish line. All it takes is to keep putting one foot in front of the other with a win and take-all mentality.

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep balanced, you must keep moving,” Albert Einstein.

Inspiration

One victory is all it takes

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, December 20, 2016 

Have you ever noticed that when a sports team is having consecutive losses people want key players fired? I hear people saying, “that lousy bum isn’t worth all that money.”

But as soon as the team has an impressive win, people change their minds knowing these players are really exceptional. Now they are saying, “I knew we would make the playoffs.”

Isn’t it amazing that after all the losses, it only takes one good victory to change everyone’s thought process?

Admit it, we’ve all felt that way about certain sports players, even other people in our lives.

It’s not fair, but this is how life and others treat us, too.

Maybe you’re the one going through a string of losses. It seems like one situation after another is not going your way.

Why am I having so many challenges at work? Why is there a miscommunication with my family? I’m working my tail off and no one is giving me respect. I’m really getting frustrated and depressed.

Ok, we all deal with those situations, but today you’ll turn the corner.

Just like in sports, all you need is one victory to change the course. All it takes is the feeling of accomplishment to create the right mindset.

These victories can be as small as organizing your office, finishing projects at work, home or school, and possibly doing yard work and cleaning the garage. The short-list is endless according to your lifestyle.

You might need to have an adult conversation with someone and come to a mature conclusion. You’ll both feel better — believe me.

Once a string of small victories takes place, they’ll snowball into a playoff championship run.

Remember, our sports teams don’t start the season in the playoffs. They have to succeed in a certain number of wins to get there. Those teams, just like us, have plenty losses along the way.

But, it’s the team that doesn’t let losses keep them down that make it to the championship game.

It’s OK for people to doubt you, but never doubt yourself.

Today is your comeback day. You’ll be the master of victories and the conqueror of life. Now get out there and kick some.

Inspiration

Stay in bounds

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, December 13, 2016 

Most sports that use a ball for play will have an out-of-bounds line. Typically, within these sports, the ball is turned over to the opponent for going out-of-bounds.

Let’s use soccer for today’s lesson. Like many other sports, the whole idea is to move the ball down to the other side of the playing field to score a point in the opponent’s goal.

Of course, the drive down the field is not just a straight line. The other team will have defenders trying to steal the ball, knock you down with slide tackles, and force an out-of-bounds.

So, in order for a team to score, they’ll need protect the ball, go through or around defenders, and most importantly — stay in bounds.

Maneuvering the ball through defenders is a skill that takes practice and patience, but with persistence, will usually score a point.

I think we can all agree, our lives are like trying to score goals in soccer.

The soccer field represents our life’s journey. We are all doing our best to reach success and happiness. But, as we’ve learned, it’s not a fast straight line to reach our goals.

There will always be obstacles and people getting in your way to stop or slow down your progress. Just like in soccer, sometimes you have to regroup, take a step back and maneuver around them.

We all have human flaws too, so don’t get discouraged when you get sidetracked and fall out-of-bounds. I look at this period as a timeout. It’s easy to get depressed if you dwell on the mistake of falling off track.

Just know, you can’t control what happened yesterday, but today is all yours. So get back on the field and get moving again.

When I was coaching high school soccer, it was easy for my team to get frustrated when the opponent kept stealing the ball. But, I explained that we needed to step up to another level and focus on our game plan.

Never lose the will for the ultimate goal which is to score. It’s already within you. Create more passion with every attempt.

Now, just like in soccer, stick to your game plan in life and don’t stop until you’ve scored the winning point.

I can hear it now “Goooooaaaaal!”

Inspiration

Life gives you unlimited fouls

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, December 6, 2016 

When my son Dylan was playing basketball, I would gauge his performance on two statistical factors. The first factor: how many fouls did he commit?

In the game of basketball, you are allowed five fouls before being ejected from the game.

In the early years, Dylan would have anywhere from zero to one foul. I would explain to him that it’s obvious he wasn’t aggressive enough and needed to defend the basket better.

Besides incidental fouls, sometimes a player has to commit a foul to stop a critical point from being scored.

Dylan stepped up his defensive skills, committed at least two-to-three fouls per game, and helped keep the opponent’s score lower. And yes, he did foul out once in his career, but his shot-blocking was impressive.

The second factor I gauged Dylan on was how many times he went to the free-throw line. You see, getting free throws means you’re being aggressive offensively by driving to the basket to score.

If Dylan wasn’t getting to the free-throw line, then he wasn’t trying to score hard enough. He needed to help his teammates, take on the opponents and get to the basket.

Well, aren’t these two factors just like in life? As humans, you’ll commit multiple fouls. We all have made bad decisions, committed sins and hurt others. Some of these are embarrassing, but don’t beat yourself up over it. It’s a part of life that helps us grow and mature as adults.

Not all our fouls are committed on purpose. How about financial purchases, bad relationships or workplace choices?

The beauty of all this is life will give you unlimited fouls. Just do your best to not repeat the same foul.

Also, recognize life will foul you back. This will be your turn to shoot at the free-throw line. It’s a moment to regroup, reflect on the situation, shoot the ball and move forward again.

When we reflect over our lives, do we think about how easy it was to score? Of course not, we’ve all had to fight through adversity to conquer life.

Just know, if you’re dealing with life’s challenges at this moment, then grip the ball, lean your body forward and fight your way to the basket and make the game-winning point.

Inspiration

Get off the sidelines

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, November 29, 2016 

In my youth, I played football for many years, but in ninth grade, I found myself standing most of the time on the sideline. I wasn’t the only kid, but I wasn’t happy about it and became discouraged.

Now, I didn’t fault my coach too much because, at that time, I was definitely not one of the bigger skilled players.

Right then I recognized, when it comes to team sports, coaches make every decision of players, plays and strategies. It’s a game of chess hoping to outsmart the opponent’s coach.

The most frustrating part of hardly ever playing was realizing that I had no control of it. As a player, you can only hope that all your efforts in practice would give you an opportunity.

Whenever our team would win, everyone was celebrating and cheering. Not me. I was embarrassed and ashamed, as I stood there in my clean uniform.

The lesson learned was that if I wanted to play the whole game and dictate the outcome, then I needed to pursue individual sports.

Once I was out of high school, I taught myself to surf, ran a marathon, became a triathlete and competed in martial arts.

Not only in sports, if I wanted to dictate my life, then I needed to pursue happiness and success to live the life I wanted.

Yes, I got knocked down, had stitches, broken bones and multiple surgeries to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. But, that only excited me because I knew I was giving my all, and the lessons of failure are only part of the process.

So, what about you? Are you standing on the sidelines of life? Are you just flying under the radar hoping to one day retire? Why have you given up?

As adults, you shouldn’t be happy with a participation trophy.

That lesson in ninth grade was a defining moment and taught me to never want to be on the sidelines again.

Now get up and recognize there’s a lot of life to live. We are fortunate to live in a country where it is possible to not only chase dreams, but to accomplish them.

One day we will all cross the pearly gates of heaven. If you walk in unscathed without scars, then you didn’t give life your best.

I plan on tumbling and sliding into heaven head first like Pete Rose. I’ll jump up and yell, “Wow, that was a crazy ride!”

Inspiration

Life in the red zone

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, November 22, 2016 

If you’re not familiar with the red zone in football, it’s an opportunity to score from the opponent’s 20-yard line into the end zone. All football teams have a strategy within the red zone because the playing field becomes much smaller.

Really, a team only has three tries to score a touchdown, or at least, hopefully, settle for a field goal. So, there’s a very specific set of strategic plays according to the team being played.

Remember, a touchdown is worth 6 points, along with a possible 1 to 2 extra points, compared to only 3-point field goals.

Teams are particularly not happy with a field goal, but will be somewhat satisfied because it at least puts points on the board.

Now, I believe many parts of our lives are like being in the red zone.

How many of you set a goal to lose 20 pounds, and once you lost around 8-10 pounds, you couldn’t find the discipline to lose the extra 10?

So, you settle for a field goal, and told yourself, “well, at least I lost some weight.” But that didn’t matter because you ended up losing the game, for within a few weeks all the weight came back. I know that last statement hurt.

How many of you settled into a relationship because it was convenient. You thought to yourself “well at least they have a job.”

You can say this about occupations, bad habits, religion, education and so on.

You must dig deep and find a way to not only reach goals, but to blow past it.

When I was teaching karate, I spent many hours showing people how to hit punching bags. To truly develop punching power, you can’t just hit the front of the target, you must put your fist through to the other side. Every muscle within your body has to be behind that punch.

So, come on now, let’s not settle for field goals any longer. We live our lives in the red zone. As we get closer to our goals, the reward is within reach, and strategies become crucial.

It’s time to pad up and strap on your helmet because today you will score a touchdown. No opponent, anyone or any situation can stop you. The ball is in your hands as you fight through all adversity.

Now spike the ball, yell at the top of your lungs and do a crazy end zone dance because you just won the day.

Inspiration

Take the wheel of life

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, November 15, 2016 

Are you behind on your goals and dreams? Are the bills stacking up? Why haven’t you lost the weight needed? For some reason, there is one problem after another.

Look, we all have multiple problems throughout our daily lives. As adults, we can’t escape the responsibilities of trying to maintain a normal life, especially parents.

It’s easy to stay in the same old routine and accept defeat. Don’t throw in the towel and say “well, at least I made it through another month.” Stop letting bad habits keep you from moving forward.

You must dig deep and create a passion to help stay focused and drive through it. You’re in the driver’s seat speeding through a time warp. Sometimes the road will have many curves, stop signs, U-turns, along with speed zones and road bumps. It’s your choice to accelerate or brake.

My previous vehicle lasted for 235,000 miles. During that time, I kept the oil current, put on new tires and brakes, along with another transmission. That car was my livelihood. It took me to work and back, drove the kids to all their functions, and became part of the family.

You must treat yourself like a prized car. Eat healthy foods by changing your diet, and exercise outdoors. It’s also important to pamper yourself when needed.

Get mad and take back your life. Now is the time to put the brakes on old routines and bad habits, and accelerate toward your dreams.

Don’t be scared. Yes, you’ll have a few bumps and dents along the way. Just make the repairs and get back on the road. We’ve all worn casts for broken bones, along with stitches and bruises. And, of course, mental scars too. Give yourself a “high-five” for attacking life.

Enough is enough. You now have control and will keep life on the road to success. When people try to cut in front of you, drive around and pass them up. Take the lead, and be the first through the checkered flag.

You’re the winner, and will earn all the prizes because it was you who took over the wheel of life.

 

Inspiration

Clean up after the battle

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, November 1, 2016 

We all have multiple battles we deal with each day. The most common battles are maintaining a job for financial security, relationships with spouses or partners, improving a healthy lifestyle or combating life threatening illnesses — just to name a few.

There are many of you who are, or you have someone you know who is, battling cancer. The good news is you’ve caught it early and won the battle. But, it’s the cleanup that’s preventing you from being excited about life again.

What do I mean by “cleanup?” Yes, you’ve kicked cancer’s butt, and now, there’s many follow-up doctor’s visits, plus the healing process. You must accept this will take time and is part of winning the battle. Don’t let the cleanup keep you down. Make it a victory lap where you get to thank all the medical staff, friends and family involved.

To me, it’s like when a country defeats the enemy in battle. They’ve blown up many buildings to flush out and kill the bad guys. Yes, you’ve won the mission, but the streets and cities must be cleaned up and put back together to help the innocent citizens. It’s hard to truly celebrate until the process has been completed.

I hope this makes sense because it’s just like your body. It needs to repair and clean up after all the treatments.

Think about it, the cleanup process is in every battle, including divorce, occupational changes and even resolved spousal disputes.

None of us can escape life’s battles. It really comes down to a positive mindset. Recognize your life will continue and every day is day to rejoice.

If you’re reading this column, then you’re alive, breathing, heart is beating and you have the emotions of love.

Regain your love of life because we are all unique and beautiful. Look around and see all the amazing people who love and embrace you.

Now relax, it’s going to be OK because today is the best day of your life.

Inspiration

“The Power of You”

By DAVID TEPERA | Posted: Tuesday, October 25, 2016 

My sister Karen Tepera Franklin is a very successful business woman in the apartment management industry. Each year, Karen hosts an annual conference she created called WAM — Women’s Asset Managers.

Over the past few years, WAM has grown from three women to nearly 200, and has become a nationally known and recognized conference.

This year’s conference theme was “The Power of You.” Recently, Karen was in town visiting, so I had an opportunity to pick her brain about the theme.

Karen explained that all of us have a story that empowers us. Almost all successful people had dealt with tragedy and failure. It’s during these times we truly find ourselves and the will to power through it.

Now, how true is all that statement? I’m sure each of you, at this very moment, is reflecting on past or current struggles. Most common struggles are healthier lifestyles, occupational changes, relationships and self-worth.

Here’s how Karen and many others have used “The Power of You” to enhance their lives and accomplish goal setting.

You have to take on the mindset of a gladiator. In case you don’t know, the true term of a gladiator is a warrior that goes into each battle knowing that if you don’t give your all, you’ll die. This means you’ll empower determination to focus on a target and not stop until it’s been conquered.

Have you ever heard the phrase “burn the boats?” It’s when you land on an island to build a new life. You burn the boats so there’s no escaping and returning to failure. You’re forced to work and fight every day if you want to survive.

The beauty of this type of determined behavior is the final reward. You’ll win each day and be one step closer to your target. Even the days you get knocked down, you’ll learn from it, regroup, re-strategize and come out swinging.

One of my dad’s favorite quotes is, “It’s not that I want to. I had to”.